God is GOOD.

It's finally Autumn (ish) around here. The weather is starting to cool down to the 70's and lower, the Santa Ana winds are howling, and all of a sudden I feel depressed. It took me awhile to finally put my finger on it, as I hadn't thought of it at all since mid summer.

I should be just in my 3rd trimester.

I should be bustling about my kitchen, making pies for tonight, pressing my belly against the counter, straining to reach my different flours. I should be starting to find it difficult to find comfortable sleep positions. I should be bathing in lotion, trying to avoid stretch marks.

But instead I'm jumping up and kneeling on my kitchen counters to easier reach my different flours. I'm sleeping like a log most nights, because I've been staying up late sewing, planning and being productive. I'm remembering to put on lotion, when my skin feels like an alligator's.

In one regard, when moments like this hit me, I feel so empty, like something is missing. (which, honestly, is true.) But at the same time, I feel so full!

God knew that my little one (1.5, as I've started calling him), would be better going straight from the warmth and love of my womb, straight to the eternal warmth and love and joy of His arms. God knew that I would need my full energy and non-hormonal patience for when my sweet boy dumps his entire bowl of soup onto his tray at lunch time. (which just happened, mind you) God knew that my schedule would be so FULL that I would have had a hard time keeping it all together if I was pregnant right now. God knows what I don't-the future.

Maybe, instead of giving birth around New Years, I'll be helping someone move, or help a family with their kids, or just have a wonderful time relaxing with the family at home. Maybe, instead of balancing a newborn and a toddler early next year, maybe I'll be balancing more sewing projects and maybe moving?  Maybe, instead of staying home with two kids, I can take my one over to a friend's house and help her with her newborn.

Who knows? Not I.

Even though moments like now, my heart feels heavy, I choose to be content. I choose to have joy. The Lord has given me peace. Yeah, I may not be bouncing around the house today, but I will not wallow in self pity. I am healthy. My husband is healthy and has a wonderful job. My son is healthy and full of energy. (ok, that last bit about his energy may not be the greatest thing...) I just finished some big sewing projects for clients that helped to pay off some costumes I made this summer. Life is good. We are blessed. My little 1.5 is walking with Jesus, meeting family we have in Heaven, experiencing a closeness with God that I have yet to experience!

And we've been busy. I'm making pies today for our ladies retreat tonight. Tomorrow morning I'll be making muffins, then later tomorrow dinner rolls. (and then a cinnamon bun cake and waffles on Sunday!) We're planning Festividad this year for church. We have an anime convention in January. Our cup is full.

The Lord gives, and the Lord takes away. Blessed be the name of the Lord!

~*~*~

So today I'm trying out two new recipes. An Americana Apple Pie and a Moo-Less Chocolate Pie. (I'm especially excited about the chocolate pie, no surprise there! Neither of them are originally my recipe, so here's the two links to both recipes:

The apple pie smells amazing! I just pulled it out of the oven, and I gotta say, it really does smell good. I'm looking forward to cutting it open tonight and trying it out.
http://thefitchen.com/2013/06/25/americana-apple-pie/

I have the crust finished (just use gluten free cookies for the crust), and once my little guy is down for his nap I'll continue on and make the filling. So excited for this one!
http://www.foodnetwork.com/recipes/alton-brown/moo-less-chocolate-pie-recipe/index.html

 

Doesn't that pie look good?!

He did this while I was typing. I suppose the spoon just wasn't working fast enough!

Seasonal Cravings continued...

So part of the seasonal cravings include desserts. Like, apple pie. And we all know that Thanksgiving is coming up, and that Thanksgiving isn't Thanksgiving without apple pie. So I need to perfect an apple pie to eat during that holiday! And let me tell you, we got it.

Over the weekend I made pie dough from scratch, and the filling, and put it all together Monday evening so I could bring fresh pie to Bible study. Sooo good! It's a wheat free, sugar free recipe, and it tastes yummy! The guys said they couldn't tell it was sugar free. I'm just happy because it wasn't an overbearing sweet, or an overbearing tart. A perfect balance was achieved. I'm so thrilled! I altered the crust recipe ever so slightly, because I can't have oat flour, but other than that, it was basically the same as I had found it. I'm thrilled.

5 oz almond flour
2 oz tapioca flour
2 oz teff flour
2 oz sweet rice flour
2 oz TG's all-purpose flour
3 oz potato starch
2 tsp xantham gum
1 1/4 guar gum
1/2 tsp kosher salt
5 TBSP butter, cold, unsalted
4 TBSP leaf lard (it's hard to find, I ended up using pure veggie shortening)
1 egg
6-8 TBSP cold water

Mix all the dry ingredients really well, no one wants to get a mouthful of pure potato starch! I sifted them together, but be forewarned that sifting almond flour can be a bit of a pain...it doesn't sift all that well.

Add the fats. I grated frozen butter into it. Keep the fats as cold as possible. Mix in the butter, and then add the lard.

Again, keep them as cold as possible, and mix as thoroughly and quickly as you can. Mix the dough by hand thoroughly. Pick up the dough with your hands, let it fall through your fingers. Feel the sandy texture. Rub it together, feel the fats become one with the flours. You'll feel when you're done.

Combine the egg with 3 TBSP of water and whisk. Pour into the dough and start mixing it in. You have two choices-you can keep mixing it by hand, or you can put it in a food processer to finish the job. Food processers do an AMAZING job with gluten-free pie crusts, but by hand is so much more enjoyable. Your call. Add water as needed to make it not dry dough. If you add too much water, add some potato starch til it's back to a more dry consistancy.

Once the dough itself is done, wrap or cover and put in fridge for about 15 minutes.

Pull out that dough and get ready for fun! Place it between two wax papers, we're gonna roll it out! When you think its as thin as you can get it, go thinner. Carefully flip onto the pie pan you're using. If it breaks, don't worry! Gluten-free food isn't as elastic-y as gluten foods, so it's not unusual. On the plus side, it's rather easy to finger it back together. Do so now. See? It's fine. ^_^

Crimp the edges if you want to, and prepare for the pie making part!

THE PIE PART:

1 1/2 cup unsalted butter
1/3 cup water
3 TBSP TG's all-purpose flour mix
1/3 cup agave nectar
1/3 cup honey
3 TBSP maple syrup
6 granny smith green apples

Melt the butter on the stovetop in a small saucepan. Add water and flour, stir. Slowly add in nectar, honey, and syrup. Heat all the way through. Lay off the heat.

Skin and slice the apples. Arrange them in the pie pan in a mound, and carefully build a lattice with the pie crust. The dough will break easily, but can be easily put back together.

Crimp edges together when the lattice is finished. Slowly pour the sauce through the lattice into the apple pie. (don't let it pour quickly, or the sauce will run out the lattice-work!) Once it's all in there, bake in a preheated oven of 375 for about an hour or until the apples are tender. Serve warm.

I sprinkled cinnamon and nutmeg on top

ENJOY!